Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
