The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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