yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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