I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
