It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
