every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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