we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
