I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
