your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
