For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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