grandma shit on top of the toilet
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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