Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm too high and old for this...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
