Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
