good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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