mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
