So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
