i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
