Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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