hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
