So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
