I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
