garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
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