Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize