Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
