it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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