OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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