All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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