oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
