I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
