i will never coherently bang her
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
