When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
