he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
