Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
