Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
