Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
