yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
