do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
