i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Can Purell be used as lube?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
