i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
