I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
