I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
