he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
