You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
