Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
