your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
