is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Randomize