hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
