your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
