Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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