Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
